Why a Smaller Wedding May Not Add Up Financially

Image courtesy ABC News.

You and your fiance may have your own reasons for wanting a small wedding with a minimal number of guests. Maybe you both have demanding jobs, aren't in a great place financially, or would simply rather focus your energy on something other than wedding planning. Less guests means less complications to deal with.

Despite this – you should know that saving money on a wedding isn't necessarily the same thing as profiting from your wedding.

First, let's get a potentially awkward topic out on the table. You are not selfish if you hope to make, rather than owe, money on your wedding.

If you're like most NJ brides and grooms, you have likely attended your fair share of weddings for family, friends and coworkers. You know what the going rate is for covering your plate cost and giving a little something extra for the bride and groom's new life together.

If you multiply the going rate by the number of guests you expect to attend your wedding, then you get your total "break-even budget" for paying for this entire party. Let's say it's $200 per couple, or to make things easier, $100 per person.

$100 per person x 50 people = $5,000 wedding budget just to break even.

$100 per person x 150 people = $15,000.00 wedding budget just to break even.

A smart wedding planner (aka frugal bride) will then itemize each aspect of the wedding day using a guesstimate at first, and then later, an actual figure that comes straight from each receipt.

Keep track of your expenses as the wedding plan unfolds. You may end up spending $300 trying to find the right lingerie and accessories, to later decide that you'd rather recoup that $300 on chair covers that really weren't all that critical to having a wonderful day.

Again, to those who think it's "tacky" to calculate wedding costs in a strategic manner:

1. It is not selfish to hope to profit from your wedding. It's only selfish if you plan to do something sketchy with the money, like buy street drugs or go on a self-indulgent spending spree.
2. You have already probably been quite generous in sending off other couples with a hefty envelope and best wishes for an amazing married life. Now it's your turn.
3. If your/his parents have offered to pay for all or part of the wedding, then it's your duty to put their gift to good use. Any grandparent would be far happier to see their generosity going toward a savings account for their grandchildren, as opposed to watching it get blown on plastic wedding favors.
4. If you sacrificed valuable work hours to tend to your wedding plans, then you will probably be making less money this year (for example, if you freelance like I do). Try to think of your wedding as a way to make up for the income that you may have lost.

So, to make my point: the number of wedding guests does in fact change the amount you can expect to owe, or recoup, from your wedding-day investment. Do the math and figure out how much you'll be paying the venue for various numbers of guests – say, 50 guests, 100 guests, 150 guests, 200 guests. After you know the per-plate total, you must factor in all the additional wedding expenses. Add those to the total venue price.

Next, times the number of guests by the amount you expect to receive, on average, as a gift per person (remember, it's per person, not per couple). Take that number and compare it to the total estimated cost of your wedding. If it's greater than the total cost, then subtract the cost from the gift amount and that's how much you'll make. If it's less, then you need to review your wedding plan and see how many more (or less) people to invite, and/or how many items you must cut from your wedding-day budget.

Repeat rule of thumb for the budget-savvy bride and groom: if you make a list of each expenditure and then allocate a budget for each thing, then you can assure that in the end your wedding will be a gift to yourselves for your future.