5 Things That are Way Cooler than Having an Expensive Engagement Ring

When did it become acceptable for a lady to expect her poor, hardworking fellow to foot the bill for a $10,000.00 engagement ring? Ladies... a big rock on your finger does not necessarily mean love, closeness, fidelity, or any of those things you expect to give and receive in your married life.

 

Below, a ton of way-cooler ideas for making use of that $9,600.00 for your partnered life together. 

 

 An incredible honeymoon! 

 Unless you already had kids before marrying each other (that's what we did!), your honeymoon will be the last hurrah before the pressing responsibilities of married life kick in. So, make it a good one if that's what you want to do. Now is your chance to book that Island Getaway, toast to the good life in Venice, explore Dover Cliffs, or hike the Grand Canyon.

A down payment on a house. 

He kicks in 10 Gs, you kick in another 8, and you've got a good chunk to put toward your future home together. Even if your parents are well-off and generous, it feels so much better to invest your own money into the home where you will make a life with your partner and maybe even raise a family. So forgo that pricey ring, and feel really good about the promise of a great life to come!

A new car. 

Are you in the family way? Perhaps a mom-van is in the cards for you. Or, maybe your worn-out wheels are due for a replacement. Having something sparkly on your hand to glance down at during your busy day isn't the worst thing. But a shiny new (and reliable) vehicle is the far more practical option.

A fat bank account. 

An extravagant wedding might make you giddy, and a big old diamond might make you feel cherished. But those feelings quickly fade when life throws you a curve ball and you have to cough up some quick cash for a life emergency, but there's no fundage to be had. Money in the bank means sleeping better at night, and even better, with the right financial advisor on your side, that nest egg will grow and grow!

Did you go with a frugal engagement ring? What did you do with the money you saved?

What's the one standout feature of your wedding that you do not regret having paid for?

Continuing on with our social media convo about wedding expenses... yesterday I posed the question,

"What's the one standout feature of your wedding that you do not regret having paid for in the least?"

 
Most who responded were either food people, booze people, music people, or all of the above! "Open bar" was probably the most common answer, and the one that received the most positive feedback from Facebook Likers.

The foodies said things like:

"Food and booze. We had it at our house under a tent, so we were able to pick exactly what we wanted (caterer is a good friend) it's been 6 years and people still talk about the food!" - Angela Sulla, PA

"Ice cream bar!" - Jess Wyble, Washington NJ (GREAT idea!)

Liz Cincola of CT, expressed a special feeling for the dress she chose, and celebrated the bargain she struck on flowers: 

"Three favorite things: my cake (included with the reception hall), my flowers (paid at cost from my mom's long time florist), and my dress - which I went halfsies with my mom because I cried when I tried it on, and she cried when she looked at the price tag."

Ann Zuccardy, too, scored some terrific, wedding-day attire: 

"My gown. It fit me like a glove with no alterations needed, but it was last year's model and at a deeply reduced price. I think I paid just over $200 for it. (In 1988.)" 

Some ladies expressed satisfaction at having invested in a pricier photographer or videographer who did an amazing job.

Libby Lomauro of North Jersey gave her husband a thumbs-up for procuring the perfect engagement ring. "He did a great job," she said.

And Nicole Dean of Pensacola, FL confessed that her honeymoon was the best wedding-themed investment she made!

Many were pleased with the band or DJ that they had chosen, saying things like: "The band! It was our single biggest expense and worth every penny. The memories from that show last forever." (Astin Benedetto, Phillipsburg, NJ)

One savvy bride offered a service trade in exchange for her wedding-day pics:

"Our photographer (which we didn't actually pay for, my husband traded a website for) and our DJ." (Becka Bossons, PA)

The most touching response goes to Maria Stepek Doherty of the UK, who offered a more sentimental take on this question:  

"Two stand outs, marrying in the Polish community church with the Polish priest officiating and having our small, immediate family only, reception in the Polish Club which my father had helped to found and keep going since he arrived penniless as a refugee. It made a powerful sense of connection with my roots."

Funniest/most practical response goes to our lone male respondent, Mike Donatelli, who said:

"Mouthwash and Advil in the goodie bag."

I think that we can walk away from this conversation with the understanding that each person is different. Your non-negotiable wedding-day feature could be very different from mine... and yet, we might both feel as though we hit the jackpot in terms of getting a deal, finding the perfect (dress, band, photographer), etc.

Happy Wedding Planning from one Frugal NJ Bride to Another!

Mini Mason Jar Wedding Favor DIY - How Cute!

What's the one thing you spent money on for your wedding that you'd take back if you could?

Pic courtesy Classicfm.com

We asked some married ladies this question as fodder for the blog. Here's what they had to say about wedding expense regrets!

"Disposable cameras on all the tables. We have many, many duplicate amateur pics of our professional ones." - Maribeth Baker, Pennsylvania

 (Ah, yes, 90s brides will remember those disposable cameras well! How many pictures do you think are out there of wedding guests partying in sunglasses and leis?)

"Everything! I love the couples I officiate for who have small, low or no-cost weddings. If I were young and getting married today, I would take whatever might be budgeted for a wedding and make a down payment on a piece of property." - Amy Jo Garner

(Hear, hear! NJ Wedding on a Budget approves of this wise statement!)

"I wouldn't bother with the videographer or hire a better one then the one I had. 3 hours of my father in law having a great time. I just need a highlight reel. Ceremony, speeches, first dance, dance with parents, comments from the tables." - K. Wilder-Bichler, Fair Lawn, NJ

"First time? Everything and it wasn't a big wedding. Second time nothing. It was perfect. I wish we had had more money. I wanted a hearse to drive us!" - B. Bossons, Pennsylvania

"Getting my hair done by a place I wasn't familiar with. We got married in Vegas at the Venetian and one price covered photos, minstral, location, flowers. We then had the reception at a separate site. The only thing I regretted was that my hair really didn't come out the way I would have liked and the same place talked me into getting my eyebrows waxed the SAME day as the ceremony!" - Nicole Bandes

"I wish I had spent money to have food catered instead of having friends and family help so that I could have enjoyed my time with them more." - Jessica Sellers

"I think I went nuts with the flowers, honestly, who remembers what arrangements were on the tables?" - Angela Sulla, Pennsylvania

"Nothing. I did a totally low budget wedding because I think so much of the wedding stuff is a huge marketing scam, including the diamond advertisements. Actually, I wish I had been more generous and spent more money on booze. I like travel and food - it's always been my thing to go low budget on cars, home decor and the like so I can eat and travel well." - Ann Zuccardy, NYC

Good thoughts from brides who have been there! Thanks for the input, ladies. Everyone else, feel free to add your remarks in the comments section of this post.

We Love Fall Wedding Hair!

Remember, frugal NJ brides... you don't have to pay upwards of $100-200 on your wedding-day up-do. You can always ask a friend who's attending beauty school or is just good with hair, to help create an unforgettable look for your fall wedding. Below, some inspiration I found on the Googles :)

Lovely basket braid found on shortlonghairstyles.net

Boho braided beauty for your wedding day. Found on Pinterest.

Perfect up-do for medium length hair... is it me or should all red heads get married in the fall!? Found on Fashiongrapher.com

Romantic hair seems to be the wedding trend this autumn. A flower crown adds the perfect touch for long, tousled locks. Found on Brides.com

 

 

 

This one is my favorite! 

The braided crown, in beautiful brown. From Brides.com